Pulling my hair out all day some days

I feel like a horrible mother for saying this but some days the whining and constant contact with my children drives me crazy enough to pull my hair out. 

I know let me hear the it is just a stage or remember they're only this little for so long. But in all honesty some days I wish they'd grow and take care of themselves. 

Why can't they come out that way?

I will share a few snippets of my last weekend as a prime example. 

Saturday we went to Sioux City to watch Dad play softball all day. The tornado like winds meant I had to hold my daughter almost the entire time. To make matters worst I was sitting on the ground - talk about a pain in the - well you know. At lunch I thought I would sneak a quick break from feeling like a kangaroo. But she has this thing where she is attached to me. Doesn't want to sit with anyone else if I am in sight. Not even her own Dad. It drives me crazy. So I got a short break to go to the car and pump (hardly a break by the way I burn calories doing that!) and then when I got back it was back to holding her again because she saw me. 

On to the whining... when does this stage end?? My son just turned 3, and I think he came out whining from what I can remember. I try very hard not to give into whining but when you're on your last nerve you just do. At Buffalo Wild Wings on Saturday, he was whining about everything under the sun. Granted he was a bit overdue for a nap and had been in the wind all day so that didn't help, but I could hardly stand it. Especially when he was in the car doing some loud whining.

Small spaces and whining do not get along well. 

Then Sunday rolled around and we went to church had to hold the daughter once again and sit with an absolutely NAUGHTY son. Here's the kicker -- I had children's chat. Literally had to take my son out of the sanctuary the 10 seconds before it because he was throwing a fit over something I don't even remember now!

I love my children. I really do. But some days I feel like these stages will never end. I know I am not the only one out there that feels this way. 

Thanks for the vent fellow kangaroos.

I said a Hip Hop a Hippy to the Hoppy

Now that the chaos that was Easter is over, I should probably share my Easter fails with you all.

I remember loving Easter as a kid. The hunt for all the eggs, the baskets beautifully placed on the counter or kitchen table waiting for us in the morning from the Easter Bunny, the excitement of a pretty new dress and matching hat (remember when that was the thing was a hat every year?!), special breakfast, a HUGE lunch with lots of cousins and playing with brand new sidewalk chalk (I can taste the smell of it right now!).

Now that I am playing the bunny, things are a bit different when it comes to Easter. And no, I am not a glammed up bunny that wears next to nothing with a fluffy ball on my butt. Oh no, this bunny is slapping on the eyeliner, getting her boobs stuffed into the only floral dress that she owns (which was from her bridal shower by the way) and then searching for shoes that please dear God I don’t break an ankle in as I am walking into church. 

This bunny is running to the store to find the perfect basket items on Friday afternoon. Searching Pinterest for the best Easter desserts to bring to the family gathering was super easy. But as you can expect from this imperfect mom, the beautiful Oreo truffle eggs that I found to look quite easy turned out more like Oreo truffle blobs… still tasted great though! What do I care right? I don’t. 

Oh yea and then there was the attempt at breakfast with my little family. I saw a real cute pin with scrambled eggs and the person made it look like a bunny. So naturally I though hey, I could do that right?! Epic fail. I scrambled up some eggs for all of us and added some cheese (because who doesn’t like cheese on their scrambled eggs?). Put it in a little circle on the plates. Then looked in the fridge. Okay cut one cherry tomato in half for the eyes, shaved off six strips of carrot for the whiskers and then used those carrot sticks for the ears. Oh yea and then the nose… oh let’s just cut a triangle out of a carrot stick. Yep perfect. Hayden will love it right?!

Not a chance. “What is that stuff?” “I don’t like carrots with my eggs” “That does not look like a bunny.” “I am going to punch you in the face for this.” Oh wait he didn’t say that but that is what I was feeling like. I went back over to the table, picked off all the carrots, carrot shavings that I so carefully placed into the eggs and tomatoes and without saying a word just threw them in the garbage. Handed my husband his bunny eggs and he laughed at me and shook his head. 

Again, epic fail.

The rest of the day went okay. Kids were in pretty clothes for a while, we had a beautiful day for it, and I got to drink some wine. (Mother of the year.)

It’s probably good that the kids won’t remember any of this. I will get better at this whole Easter thing next year. I have a whole year to get ready right? 

Oh here are the cute bunnies at one of our Easter parties. My kids look like angels. Don't let them fool you :)

All the silly bunnies including my two littlest bunnies on the right.

 

Welcome to Life as an Imperfect Mom :)

Parenting Fails, Pinterest Disasters and Crazy MOMents

I am starting this blog as a way to vent about my many parenting fails, Pinterest attempt disasters and all around crazy mom moments that I look back on and want to either laugh or cry about.

Let me start by telling you I am a mother of two very strong personalities. A three year old boy that is such a sweetheart.  He is also very smart and has a very bad temper when life doesn't go his way. My beautiful daughter is 7 months going on 17 most days. She wants to move and she wants whatever it is that she wants and she wants it right NOW (usually has to do with mom).

This blog is for those moms who feel like they are constantly trying and feeling like they are failing. The moms who work full time and still manage to somehow keep your children alive and fed (popcorn counts). Yes you know who you are. You let your four year old fall asleep on the couch once in a while because you don't have the energy to fight them to get to bed. You let them eat chocolate for breakfast if you're in a hurry to get out of the door in the morning sometimes. You pin a ton of ideas on Pintrest and so far, about 1 out of every 10 you try actually look like the photo. Oh yea and all the times you pretend like the screaming child in aisle 3 at the grocery store isn't yours. (For those of you that are crazy enough to have more than two children and you always bring the fancy treats all perfectly placed in themed bags to daycare, this blog is not for you unless you want to feel like you're doing a great job compared to me.)

You aren't failing by the way. 

We are all human. NO ONE has the stamina to take care of their children and parent in a perfect way. I haven't found one mom yet who does. Those that claim they do, aren't.

Sure, we all have things that we try to strive to be for our children. Don't get me wrong, I try very hard. But some days all my efforts don't feel like they are working. Some days I want to just be alone. No boogers, no noise, no whining, no dishes, no nothing. But I am a mom. I chose this path and I make the best of every situation. But let's be honest, it is not an easy job. This job requires you to be planning for all of your family all day long. 24 hours a day, 7 days a week.

There are not any breaks.